


Space Pirate Keelhauling

by scotchfairy



Category: Captain Harlock
Genre: Gen, How to be a Pirate, Legendary Captain, historical notes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 08:42:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27967766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scotchfairy/pseuds/scotchfairy
Summary: Some parts of shipboard life are traditional. And some have to be adapted for life in space..."But you said I was fired!""Yes. Yes I did."
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Space Pirate Keelhauling

A traditional keelhauling involves running a loop of rope under the keel of the ship, with the ends up on either side of the deck. The miscreant is tied to the two ends (usually by their wrists, but occasionally by the ankles or the wrists and ankles) and the rope is hauled one direction around the belly of the ship. Scraping our victim along the barnacle encrusted hull. Hopefully fast enough that they don't drown.

That said, it's impossible to keelhaul someone from a spaceship. I mean, you could put them on a tether and pull them along behind the ship, but as long as they're suited up, this isn't too bad. In fact, as long as they're not in the line of the drive exhaust, it might even provide some blessed alone time in an environment where one can't just step out to get away from one's crew mates.

So, how to make this an object lesson for both the offender and the rest of the crew? Well, if your spacesuits are fireproof (and on a pirate ship where you're doing boarding actions, better hope they're armored too), this piece of nastiness won't actually _harm_ the crew member being punished, but it _will_ scare the piss out of them:

Suit up the offender.

March them to the airlock.

Make sure they're tethered to the ship.

Set them on fire in the corridor.

Punt them into the lock and hit the JETTISON button.

This handily extinguishes the flames while letting our offender see just what it feels like to get shot out the airlock while on fire without _actually_ killing them.them.

The crew will fear and respect you. But they probably won't mutiny because you're killing off crew members indescriminately. Your twisted sense of humor will make you a legend among pirates. The story will be retold in planetside and spacestation bars for years.

In short, it's a good start towards being a legendary pirate captain. Now you just have to keep winning battles...


End file.
